Rewriting Your Anxiety: 3 Simple Steps to Find Relief

Anxiety: It's like an unwelcome guest that overstays its welcome, making itself at home in our minds and bodies. Whether you're a career professional juggling multiple responsibilities or an overwhelmed parent trying to keep it all together, anxiety can feel like an ever-present companion, casting a shadow over even the brightest moments of your life.

But here's the good news: you have the power to rewrite the story that leads to anxiety. With the right tools and techniques, you can take back control of your mind and find a sense of peace amidst the chaos. In this article, we'll explore three simple steps to help you do just that.

Step 1: Unmasking Automatic Thoughts

What are Automatic Thoughts?

Imagine our minds are a map of hiking trails. Some of these trails are well-traveled dirt paths with signs leading us to exactly where we need to go next. Automatic thoughts are the thoughts that travel this map of hiking trails each day. They travel down the well-established trails with ease. In fact, a lot of those automatic thoughts travel that same hiking path every day, multiple times per day. 

It is estimated that the average person has about 6,200 thoughts per day -Dr. Jordan Poppenk (Psychology Researcher at Queen’s University) and Julie Tseng (master’s student)

Negative Automatic Thoughts that lead to Anxiety

However, certain automatic thoughts are negative and lead to feelings of anxiety that take over. These automatic thoughts often stem from deep-rooted beliefs and fears. For example, if you're a career professional, you might have an automatic thought like, "I'm not good enough," or "I'll never meet deadlines." Similarly, overwhelmed parents might find themselves thinking, "I'm failing my children," or "I can't handle this."

Awareness of Anxiety Thought Patterns

The first step in rewriting your anxiety is to become aware of these automatic thoughts. Pay attention to the patterns that emerge in your mind throughout the day. When you notice yourself spiraling into anxiety, pause for a moment and ask yourself, "What am I thinking right now?” Are they about your parenting skills? Your career? Maybe it's that never-ending to-do list that's always lurking in the back of your mind. Whatever they are, grab a mental or actual notepad and jot them down. Awareness is the key to kicking those automatic thoughts to the curb.

Step 2: Stopping Automatic Thoughts in Their Tracks

Once you've identified your automatic thoughts, it's time to put the brakes on them. Think of it as playing traffic cop in your own mind – when you spot a negative thought speeding by, raise your hand and signal it to STOP.

“You can't control what thoughts pop into your head, but you can control how long they stick around.” -Jennie Allen author of Get Out Of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts

Thought Stopping

One effective technique for stopping automatic thoughts is called thought stopping. When you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, mentally shout, "STOP!" or imagine a big red stop sign flashing in your mind. Take a deep breath (or three) and tell yourself, "Hold up, that's just my anxiety talking." Then, shift your focus to something more positive or calming. It could be a mantra that resonates with you, a mental image of your happy place, or even a quick mindfulness exercise to ground yourself in the present moment.

Cognitive Restructuring

Another helpful strategy is cognitive restructuring. This involves challenging the accuracy and validity of your automatic thoughts. Ask yourself questions like, "Is there evidence to support this thought?" or "Am I jumping to conclusions?" By shining a light on the irrationality of your anxious thoughts, you can begin to loosen their grip on your mind.

Remember, you have the power to hit pause on those automatic thoughts and redirect your mental energy toward something more productive. It might take some practice, but trust me, it's worth the effort.

Step 3: Replacing Negative Thought Patterns

Stopping automatic thoughts is only half the battle. To truly rewrite your anxiety, you need to replace those negative thought patterns with healthier, more empowering ones. Think of it as creating a fresh new hiking path to add to the map. Yes, this may take work, but with persistence and practice it is achievable. 

“When you change your thoughts, you change your reality.”-Jennie Allen

Cognitive Reframing

One powerful technique for replacing negative thought patterns is cognitive reframing. This involves looking at a situation from a different perspective. Let's say you're a parent feeling overwhelmed by the constant demands of family life. Instead of dwelling on all the things you didn't get done today, try reframing your thoughts to focus on what you DID accomplish. Maybe you managed to sneak in some quality time with your kids or tackle that pile of laundry that's been haunting you for weeks. Celebrate those victories, no matter how small they may seem.

And for all you career warriors out there, grappling with the pressures of the nine-to-five grind, take a moment to acknowledge your hard work and dedication. Instead of beating yourself up over a minor setback or criticism from a coworker, remind yourself of your strengths and past successes. You've got this.

Positive Self-Talk

Another effective strategy is positive self-talk. Treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion you would offer a friend in need. When you catch yourself slipping into negative self-talk, counteract it with affirmations like, "I am capable," "I am resilient," and "I am enough.” Or try something more specific. For example, as a career professional grappling with the pressures of the nine-to-five grind, take a moment to acknowledge your hard work and dedication! Instead of beating yourself up over a minor setback or criticism from a coworker, remind yourself of your strengths. 

When to Seek Therapy for Navigating Anxiety

Finally, consider seeking professional help through anxiety therapy or counseling. I am a mental health counselor and art therapist that can provide you with the tools and support you need to navigate your anxiety and develop healthier coping mechanisms. From cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to mindfulness techniques, there are a variety of evidence-based treatments available for generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) and other anxiety disorders. To learn more about how art therapy can help with anxiety, visit how I can help through art therapy and read this article.

Rewriting Anxiety: Patience, Persistence and Willingness

So there you have it– three simple steps to rewrite your anxiety and reclaim control of your mental wellbeing. Whether you're a frazzled parent or a stressed-out professional, these techniques are your secret weapons in the battle against anxiety.

But remember, rewiring your brain takes patience, persistence, and a willingness to challenge your own thoughts and beliefs. But by taking these three simple steps – unmasking automatic thoughts, stopping them in their tracks, and replacing negative thought patterns – you can begin to create a more peaceful and fulfilling life. Similarly, hiking trails are not made in one day and take time to establish. A dirt path is only created by the foot traffic of many daily hikers.

So go ahead, take that first step toward a calmer, more balanced life. You've got this. (That’s a positive thought you could take with you, by the way!)